So far I’ve made do with standard Canon straps augmented with 10 inch long hair ties, the kind you can pick up at any Walgreens. All my lenses have five to seven of these stretchy ties wrapped around them, just in front of the lens mount. I have to get the camera strap length just right, then coil the strap over three times. Feed my hand in the first loop going downwards, then up through the second loop, then down again to meet the camera so that the camera base and lens are laying in my right palm. Then worked the last loop up over my elbow so that the strap crisscrosses around my forearm twice. Then pull the double looped hair ties wrapped around the lens over two or three or my fingers, pinning it to my hand and creating three leverage points of attachment on the camera. I use a leather motorcycle racing glove to protect my hand, which has no function or feeling in the fingers, but I do have a bit of wrist function and I can still pronate and supinate this nonfunctional hand, which becomes a camera stand in this way.

It works pretty well, and I never have to worry about dropping my camera. It’s a bit difficult to get the viewfinder up to my eye with the camera in the horizontal position, but the vertical is pretty easier to accomplish and feels most natural.

It’s a bit of a process, but I can accomplish it in about 2 to 7 minutes, depending upon how I’m dressed. It is of course a bit more work in the wintertime. I’m always looking for jackets with large or expandable sleeves that make it easier to hunch them up over the elbow. I’ve got a nice vintage Army coat that works beautifully

I’m currently looking into getting a leather worker to build me some kind of more permanent straps or perhaps a harness that will make it easier to get on and off.

The advantage of having the camera strapped to my hand in this manner is that I’m always ready to shoot. So I often go around everywhere with the camera strapped to my hand like some kind of transformer guy or something.

I’ve gotten some funny looks from the photographers in pools at events, who don’t quite know what the hell to make of me. Some kind of hideously unnatural convergence of man and camera I imagine. I suppose I am something of a cyborg in this configuration actually. And admittedly I’ve had fantasies of traveling to Japan and having the Canon engineers attach quick release mounts directly to my skeletal structure and implanting a shutter release into my brain case.

Of course I get no sympathy from the photo vultures, who have on occasion ridiculed me and actually done things like reached over and turned off my flash while I’m shooting. Typical fucking photojournalists, desperately scrambling to get an increasing share of a shrinking market. Is there a lower form of life in the universe? Just kidding guys… OK not really. Actually I’m to the point now where I use my malformation to psych out the competition. You know how photographers are, they see somebody with the latest toy and immediately they begin to feel inferior. And that’s how I play it, like some kind of fancy new harness, and the next thing you know the weasels lose heart and realize that they’re nothing but paid hacks in comparison to the mighty Cameraman.

I’m sure that my method of hanging onto a camera is rather novel. With both of my arms permanently fixed at right angles and only about 3 inches or maybe 5° of play in each elbow, and only partial use of one hand, a hand that cannot pronate or supinate any longer, I had something of an engineering challenge to begin with.

So far I’ve made do with standard Canon straps augmented with 10 inch long hair ties, the kind you can pick up at any Walgreens. All my lenses have five to seven of these stretchy ties wrapped around them, just in front of the lens mount. I have to get the camera strap length just right, then coil the strap over three times. Feed my hand in the first loop going downwards, then up through the second loop, then down again to meet the camera so that the camera base and lens are laying in my right palm. Then worked the last loop up over my elbow so that the strap crisscrosses around my forearm twice. Then pull the double looped hair ties wrapped around the lens over two or three or my fingers, pinning it to my hand and creating three leverage points of attachment on the camera. I use a leather motorcycle racing glove to protect my hand, which has no function or feeling in the fingers, but I do have a bit of wrist function and I can still pronate and supinate this nonfunctional hand, which becomes a camera stand in this way.

It works pretty well, and I never have to worry about dropping my camera. It’s a bit difficult to get the viewfinder up to my eye with the camera in the horizontal position, but the vertical is pretty easier to accomplish and feels most natural.

It’s a bit of a process, but I can accomplish it in about 2 to 7 minutes, depending upon how I’m dressed. It is of course a bit more work in the wintertime. I’m always looking for jackets with large or expandable sleeves that make it easier to hunch them up over the elbow. I’ve got a nice vintage Army coat that works beautifully

I’m currently looking into getting a leather worker to build me some kind of more permanent straps or perhaps a harness that will make it easier to get on and off.

The advantage of having the camera strapped to my hand in this manner is that I’m always ready to shoot. So I often go around everywhere with the camera strapped to my hand like some kind of transformer guy or something.

I’ve gotten some funny looks from the photographers in pools at events, who don’t quite know what the hell to make of me. Some kind of hideously unnatural convergence of man and camera I imagine. I suppose I am something of a cyborg in this configuration actually. And admittedly I’ve had fantasies of traveling to Japan and having the Canon engineers attach quick release mounts directly to my skeletal structure and implanting a shutter release into my brain pan, à la Johnny Mnemonic.

It seems to be working ok. It is not as comfortable as with the fasten-r because of the direction but it feels safer and a much more compact setup.